A lively night

Paul Oakenfold. A man who’s music I have been listening to since I was about 12 or so. He produced Happy Mondays’ Pills, Thrills ’N’ Bellyaches; man that must have been a tough job. He remixed everyone from U2 to Massive Attack through the 90s. Then he became the most successful DJ on the planet. (Quite literally - the Guinness Book of Records says so.)

I interviewed him once. He was grumpy and untalkative and a bit of a nightmare. It was all hugely disappointing. Somehow I had to make a feature from his monosyllabic answers, which wasn’t a pleasant job. But we’ll gloss over that.

I’ve danced to his DJing a couple times before, most memorably at a Gatecrasher New Year’s Eve party in Birmingham with my sister. Now I’m doing to be doing it again. In Bangkok of all places.

I was more than excited when Jess told me he was DJing here. I’d been getting a bit bored with the routine of working, eating and going to the cinema. Now there was something to look forward to again. Something genuinely exciting.

Although I cancel Nop’s lesson to go, I still attend my muay Thai session. Which is a bit silly cos I’m bloody knackered when I meet Jess and we go to Lisa’s down the road. Nick’s there, looking at a place in Lisa’s building. We chat as we wait for Lisa. I tell him about my plans to do Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia in a month. He agrees it’s doable as he did it. He gives me some tips, such as fly as much as possible cos overground travel is painfully slow. Of Laos he says Luang Prabang isn’t really worth doing – it’s just a pretty town with a nice wat to look at, and he’s sure I’ve seen enough of them. He has a point. He says Vang Vieng in Laos is fun – you can go tubing (sitting in a rubber tube and floating down the river, ostensibly). Of Vietnam he tells me Halong Bay is stunning, and that Hanois is better than Ho Chi Minh City (formerly Saigon), but HCMC has the Cu Chi tunnels, which are worth a visit.

We head to Sukhumvit, where we meet up with Joey (who is REALLY excited!) and then Fliss (typically laid-back). We go to the club to buy our tickets – it’s early but we wanna make sure we get in. Just walking up to the place is exciting – drapes and lights make it feel like a swanky celebrity haunt. It’s all very ostentatious. We love it.

In stark contrast, The Ship Inn is not ostentatious. It’s a Thai attempt at a British pub, and not a bad attempt at that. It has a dartboard.

We order food. All I want is a burger and chips so I have one. Lisa orders a chip butty. It’s bloody massive when it turns up. She seems a bit scared by it.

After we eat the others play darts while I chat to Joey. It’s the first time I’ve chatted to her properly I think. She’s a cool girl – I like her unbridled enthusiasm for things.

Jess goes out for a fag. She comes back in laughing. “I almost forgot we were Thailand for a moment,” she says, throwing a dart. “Then I walked out and saw an elephant going past.”We can delay no longer. We head to the club, taking pics of the swish entrance before we go in.

Inside it’s pretty quiet, we’re still pretty early. It’s fairly small as clubs go – a long room on lots of different levels. We navigate podiums, cross the dancefloor and find ourselves a table under the DJ booth.

The music is good, though Oakie’s not on for awhile. We dance a bit, drink a bit, take photos a bit. I discover ‘Night Scene’ mode on my camera and go a little crazy with it.

I’m excited. I miss clubbing. We talk about drugs. A pill would go down nicely right now but it’s not going to happen in this country, not for me anyway. You need to know the right people and tread a whole lot more carefully than you do back home. Drugs are heavily frowned on here, to understate it somewhat.

Joey goes off to chat up farang men. We watch her talking to a man who is as tall as she is short. He seems very bemused by her. Times passes. Still no sign of Oakie. The girls get a little impatient. They have to work tomorrow so don’t want it to be crazy late when they get home. Midnight comes and goes and still no sign. He was due on at 11. And then suddenly the girls’ panic is forgotten. He’s here.


The place erupts. I suddenly realise just how full the place now is; a total contrast to when we arrived. Well-dressed Thais mix with not as well-dressed farang. All have big grins on their faces as podgy Paul kick-starts his set.

He plays some thrillingly energetic trance music. Lisa and I run to a podium the moment we hear the first strains of Faster Kill Pussycat, which he plays early on. We laugh at a guy dancing on a stage above us, as he pulls some funny rave moves with his glow sticks, all the while wearing sunnies. I keep hitting a guy sat beneath me but I don’t care. This. Is. Amazing.

I dance on and off. I’m shagged from muay Thai, but the music keeps me getting up for more. The heat doesn’t help. I go and hang out by the fan where some crazy Thai lady starts flicking her hair at my chest. I look around and notice I’m surrounded by pilled up Thais. A little jealously I wonder what the ecstasy is like here. I ain’t gonna find out though.

Joey is lost in the music. Lisa is loving it.

Even more so when Oakie waves at her a couple times. Fliss and Jess dance happily. I get up and dance on stage for a bit, getting a good view of Oakie at work and the crowd bouncing beneath me. Oakie seems to think he’s the wizard of Oz, doing lots of funny hand movements like he’s actually making the music with his hands. Weirdo. But hey, he’s still pulling off an amazing set.

Just as it seems to be finishing I clamber down and head over to the girls. But then he plays another one – the anthemic The World Is Mine – and I rush back to the stage.

And then it’s over. Unbelievable. The girls are relieved – it’s nearly three and they have to be up in a few hours. But I could have had some more of that. It was awesome!